A little over three weeks ago on March 13th, we had to put our dog Peanut to sleep. She had stopped eating, had a hard time getting around and looked at us like she knew it was her time to go. She had some non-cancerous tumors but they must have grown pretty rapidly, because one week she seemed fine, and by the next it was really too late to do anything.
If you didn’t know the story, Peanut came to us as a stray. Keeshonden are not a common breed, and for her to show up on our doorstep was pretty amazing. She spent a wonderful six years with us and we’ll miss her dearly.
The really weird piece for me is that this is the first time (save for the first couple years of college) that a dog hasn’t owned me. I grew up with dogs, and even before college was done, I made sure to have another canine companion. Since college we’ve had as many as four at a time in our home. And in our current house, we’ve always had a pup roaming the halls.
But now, we don’t.
I still find myself looking down to make sure I don’t step on a dog when turning a corner, or heading to another room. I’ve teared up when I have no one to give the yolk of my hard boiled egg to. I still have the urge to open the door to let the dog out before I leave or get home from work. These things I’ve done forever are no longer applicable. It feels empty.
My wife was sure I’d have to have another dog immediately, but I think she has the itch even more than I do. That said, I’m going to wait awhile. Maybe replace some carpet, and avoid the wet spring. Then we can look again. I have no doubt we’ll add another furry family member, but not quite yet. In the meantime, we have the photos to remember Peanut by, and we’ll give a little extra love to the cat.
I want to thank my wife for taking Peanut in for her final visit to the vet. I was crushed when I took Shadow in, and I couldn’t get that out of my head. My wife took the burden off of me and did it herself, and I know it was a really hard thing for her to do as well, no matter how necessary it was.
Have fun running in the wind Peanut, we’ll miss you.