"…we are the mishaps that always happen in threes"
Well…looks like I’ll be attending another funeral here soon. My wife’s grandmother has probably less than a week to live. She’s being transported here today, and will either finish her days in a local hospice or possibly our house.
Why our house? Well, it used to be her’s. We own my wife’s grandparents house. It was built by her grandfather, and her Dad and uncles grew up here. Her grandfather even died here (in our bedroom to be exact.) The house has been in the family nearly 60 years at this point, and it only seems fitting that Anna may return here to pass on.
Needless to say, it’s not a good situation, and I’m not looking forward to another death around here so quickly, especially when it might happen in my office. But, Anna hasn’t been doing well for some time, so maybe this will bring some peace. I feel really bad for my father-in-law who seems to be taking it hard, and I know that Jen is being a real trooper, but probably not doing so well on the inside.
In a couple weeks we’re supposed to visit one of my best friends and his wife and kid. Well since this may throw a wrench into things, I wanted to let him know. Well, his wife just found out that her mother only has two weeks to live due to cancer. So the trip is called off, and they have their own things to deal with.
[sigh] Not a good few weeks… Hopefully this is the end of the proverbial trio of bad things…
August 10, 2006 @ 8:44 am
Hey. Thoughts and prayers for you on this one.
I think that’s really cool that you guys would bring her home to end out her life. That’s just such a wonderful way to honour her. That takes a lot of guts on your part and I really really respect that. Not an easy choice I’m sure…
August 10, 2006 @ 10:30 am
Rough couple of months my friend. I’m sorry for you. It is a very cool thing you are doing by “bringing her home”. Dying in a hospital is so….cold. Dying in you home, with your family around you is a much nobler way to go.
You and your family are in my prayers my friend.
-Devin.
August 10, 2006 @ 12:01 pm
Gotta agree that bringing her home is a very kind thing to do. And yes, this must be really hard after just losing Sharon. But I know that in my dad’s case, he was getting pretty frail and routine tasks were getting impossible; I imagine it’s similar for Anna. It’s such a blessing for folks to be able to die at home, instead of in the sterile, cold, noisy, over-lighted hospital-type settings. We were meant to be social creatures, and that includes living AND dying in familiar surroundings with loved ones near.
Peace
August 10, 2006 @ 6:22 pm
I’m so sorry, Grey. If practice makes perfect, then your family is in the “stellar” category. Keep up the compassion and care you’ve displayed for Sharon, and by bringing Jen’s grandmother “home.” I too found that bringing loved ones home to die in familiar surroundings brought them more peace; and brought those of us who continued on a bit more comfort and closure.
Maybe Anna will leave some positive, protective energy in your office.
My thoughts are with you, Jen and your family.
August 10, 2006 @ 8:41 pm
Hey guys, thanks for all the support. But, don’t go whacking me on the back too much though as the family didn’t take us up on the offer. She’s at a local hospice facility instead. They felt that logistically it would be easier for all involved. All of the extended family could come and go at any time of day unannounced.
The nice thing is that this place is wonderful… It’s made for everyone to come over (including pets.) It’s not the sterile environment you would expect.
http://www.joliethospice.org/virtualtour.php
So thank you guys for all your thoughts and prayers, I’m just not as cool as ya all thought…
August 11, 2006 @ 9:37 am
Ahem.
Not to blow smoke up your ass, but you my friend, most definitely are as cool as we think.
-Devin.
August 11, 2006 @ 7:51 pm
No need to be so self-deprecating. I second Devin.
August 11, 2006 @ 11:30 pm
Hey John,
Sorry you and Jen are having such a difficult Summer. Having been denied the chance for an extended goodbye when my grandfather developed complications after surgery, I hope you’ll agree there is a bright side to this otherwise sad situation.
Thoughts and prayers coming your way. Take care.
-Kev