Joy
I know there are people out there that go through their lives “child-free” and do so by choice. Some of you even call people like me “breeders.” That’s all well and good, you are free not to over-populate the world. If that’s a choice you want to make, great.
That said, this past weekend I was watching my four year-old daughter. She was running through my recently mown back yard, and she was running and jumping and chasing a butterfly. The butterfly was her new friend. It was so innocent and sweet and full of joy. Watching her filled me with love and made me so genuinely happy.
I feel sorry for you child-free folks, because you’ll never have that feeling.
Ray "The Lion King" Bilyk
May 9, 2006 @ 2:05 pm
So true, Greyhawk, so true…
Aren’t 4 year olds the best?
Sean Burgess
May 9, 2006 @ 8:11 pm
I got a 3 1/2 year old boy that, on certain days, I would sell to you…..cheap!
Sean—
Greyhawk68
May 9, 2006 @ 9:28 pm
No no no Phig, MY kids rule, everyone elses are evil
Trust me, I find myself wanting to sell my two every once in awhile too, but then they do something so damn cute and loving that you just can’t.
I’m convinced that children were made so cute as a natural defense so we wouldn’t kill ’em!
And yes Ray, four is a great age!
-John
a feminist
May 12, 2006 @ 3:11 am
Greyhawk, that’s interesting, because as a childfree individual myself, I feel sorry for you lol. I know that bringing kids up isn’t all about butterflies an innocence And if any childfree person (as opposed to childless) regrets their decision later in life, at least they only have themselves to blame/involve. But as long as we’re both secure in our life decisions, there isn’t a problem. I’m happy that you feel you made the right decision having kids — trust me, you don’t need to feel sorry on my behalf !
Greyhawk68
May 12, 2006 @ 7:32 pm
Hello um, a feminist
I like your site, and after reading a many of your posts, we agree on pretty much everything except the kid issue. And believe me, I was once like you, I didn’t want kids. But, I fell in love with a woman who did… So, if I wanted to spend my life with her, I knew that kids were part of the deal.
And trust me, I don’t denounce your lifestyle choice at all. In fact, once in awhile I do envy it. But the vast majority of the time, the love and joy I get from those little human beings far outweighs the benefits I would have had in a childfree lifestyle.
I was truly sitting there watching my daughter and thinking to myself, “I feel sorry for them (the childfree set)” It wasn’t facetious in any manner. I truly felt that way.
So coming up on this mother’s day, I’m truly endebted to my wife for bringing me over to the having children side. I wouldn’t have it any other way now.
I’m glad we’re both confident in our choices
Take Care,
Grey
a feminist
May 13, 2006 @ 6:34 am
Greyhawk, thanks for the compliments re: my site. My own OH was “on the fence” so to speak about having children – now he thanks me for bringing him over to my side Funny old world, eh? I don’t know if I’d have gone as far as having kids to keep my OH, I just couldn’t see me making that sacrifice (though having a few health issues meaning that it would be ill-advised at best for me to carry a child, which maybe brings a new perspective on things)…
Just a final thought, I’m glad to see you wrote “some… even call people like me ‘breeders'”. At least with me, that’s really only a jokey term I use to refer to parents; there is no malice; this is only ever meant as a derogetary term for IRresponsible parents. As long as you’re making sure your offspring are healthy, happy, responsible, valued members of society, CFers are happy as larry – or at least this one is.
Greyhawk68
May 13, 2006 @ 2:19 pm
Yup, to each their own. I could tell that “breeders” in your sense really held no malice. There are some more militant CFers that do use that as a fairly nasty term however, but I could tell from reading your site that you are not one of them.
Also, I like to see that you don’t really hold any disdain for SAHM’s either. Many times some people that wield the “feminist” moniker don’t like to think that some women WANT to make that sacrifice in order to be instrumental in the raising of their children. It’s not an easy task, and one that my wife excels at.
As for making the sacrifice (to have children) to keep my wife, it was well worth it. Well for one, I like being a Dad… heh, but for the other, we’ve had a very happy 11 year marriage, and I cannot imagine being as happy with anyone else. Weird huh?
But yes, there’s room enough for both of us. I’ll keep an eye on your site, I really liked it!
Take Care,
Grey